You know…there are so many times that I give up on myself. Those little moments of weakness when, despite doing everything I am supposed to, I get frustrated and impatient with progress…or the lack thereof.
And I break down…I melt down…I just…fall apart.
This past weekend was extremely hard. I was the very back of the pack on the training run…on my slow walk from Swags to Iroquois Park…and as the half marathon group lapped me…I turned around and walked back. I tried to stay positive, even doing an Instagram Story and keeping it lighthearted. But the fact of the matter was, for months, since signing up for the Mercedes-Benz Half Marathon…it has all I’ve been looking forward to doing. And I wasn’t even going to do it for time. But, when I went in to see my physical therapist on the Tuesday leading into race weekend, I inquired as to whether I could just go and walk the 13.1 miles. And my amazing, and very patient therapist looked at me like…
Like…come on! It was a logical question, yes? Right? Yeah…I probably deserved the, “Really?! You crazy!” look that he gave me. But, I figured I’d ask.
On Tuesday, he gave me a resistance band to add to the hip stretch that he had me doing for 6 minutes a day. I did it religiously. Like…this stretch was my church, for real. So I have this red band that loops around my ankles and I side-step normally, with toes out, and with toes in…2 times each set…and…in addition…I have this fun leg movement that I have to do to sort of activate the hip flexor. It’s not easy. I have to do this toe tap/leg-lift thing 20 times 2 times a day. My leg gets tired. But…I do this. Because I want to get better. And, I’m pretty freakin’ obsessive about my PT stuff. Always have been.
On Thursday, I went back. And my physical therapist started me off with a simple walk. He said that I was still limping, but at this point, he wasn’t sure how much of that was just habit. SO…we were going to focus on getting rid of that limp. AND…in addition, he stepped it up with me. First he had me step up onto the stairs, using my bad hip to pull up, not the opposite foot to push off. This was hard…but it did prove that the hip was still pretty tender when asked to control the entire movement of my body. He had me step up and down. Then we moved onto lunges with the stair. Up the step. And down the step. A little sore, but I managed it. And then…he decided to see how my body could handle marching. He got out a metronome…yes…that metronome is back…and set it for 140 bpm. He had me march in place, which, I did…and it didn’t hurt. Which shocked me. So, he moved the experiment a step further and had me march to the beat. And I managed that too, without any pain.
And my physical therapist said that he was shocked that didn’t bother me…and that meant I was further along than he even expected. YAY! After that, he gave my injured hip a bit of a massage, and realized that the tender points were definitely more on the flexor and not as much the TFL like he originally thought.
So, I continue to be a mystery. I went out for my walk with the other KDF Marathon/miniMarathon peeps on Saturday. And…like I said…I walked. I kept a smile though and was given a lot of encouragement from people who passed me either heading out or returning. Sometimes it’s not easy to wear that smile but I do it. It’s usually when I get home that I fall apart a little…
That is a pretty accurate reenactment. No joke.
Anyway…I am, as always, very thankful for everyone who continues to lift me up, support me, and believe in me. Because, when I’m ready to give up…that helps me to keep going. It helps me get off the sofa and stretch, or march, or go outside in the 28 degree weather simply to do lunges on stairs.
Instead of doing the Mercedes-Benz Half Marathon, as planned, I brought the chocolate milk to the training run, and spent some time with these amazing people, who are helping our dear Melissa, through her own injury recovery…because I am a part of a group of amazing people…and this is just a handful of them! And this is what we do. We lift up and support others…ambassadors or not.
Anyway…I’ve been working on that not limping thing. And if I manage to get that corrected, my physical therapist said that he’ll put me on the Alter-G treadmill so that I can do some running. Crossing my fingers. Because news like that makes me SO happy!
Yeah…I never thought I’d be this happy to be able to get on a treadmill!
But the Alter-G Treadmill is magic. It is. And I hope that I can start doing some actual training with the help of the magic of the Anti-Gravity treadmill! My next PT session is Wednesday…so we’ll see what he thinks. But I have to say, someone at my office said to me as I was walking down the hall, “You’re walking really good today!”
Stay tuned, friends!